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Meredith, I got this information from the donor letter accompanying Robert Richards Jr's civil war letters at the State of Wisconsin Historical Society. It's a one-page document briefly describing the letters and the circumstances including the phrase: "letters were written to the sister (mother of Elwood R. McIntyre, donor)..." The sheet has a signature of Elwood R. McIntyre and it's noted Madison WI, October 21, 1955. Elwood notes that Caroline was born 1848 and I just updated our family tree with that information. The last Civil War letter is April of 1865 and Caroline is apparently not married at that point. That's all I know at this point. You're right that she may be a wife who died young or a second wife; she may even have married a McIntyre from another area.
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